Sikh temple massacre

Today I was watching a Democracy Now video clip. It was about the person that recently committed the Sikh temple massacre. It also discussed his involvement in the white supremacist movement while in the military, and after leaving the military ranks. 

Here's a link: Sikh Temple Massacre is the Outgrowth of Pervasive White Supremacism in Military Ranks.

In the video, journalist Matt Kennard, plus academic and author Pete Semi, speak to Amy Goodman about the influence of the white supremacy movement within the military. I was not in the military during the war on terror, but I do not recall a lot being done to discipline or discourage this involvement in white supremacy, even absent active wars. I do remember seeing allot more skinheads when I was stationed in Korea than I did when I was stationed in Fort Lewis WA. I knew of several skinheads that were in tanker units, and other combat units, while in Korea. When I was stationed in Fort Lewis I was almost always around other soldiers in communications, which was our line of work. So it makes sense that I did not see a lot of skin heads while state-side, if they tend to be in a different line of work. 

Korea was my first duty station right after basic training and AIT. It was also my first time out of the country. The first time I met any skinheads in Korea, I will admit that I was a bit intimidated. I wasn't scared, mind you, just a little intimidated. After hanging out with a couple of them  for a while, I got over my intimidation. I will never agree with their kind of extreme mentality, insistence that we are somehow superior to others, and exclusion of anyone not like us. I remember having a discussion with a skinhead from the local tanker unit on Camp Hovey. We all went down range that evening and came back in a group of about five. We had been drinking. After we all got back on post the others went "home." I had been talking to, I believe, the only skinhead in the group that night. We kept walking and talking, I think he had a lot on his drunk mind. I don't remember all of our discussion, but I remember he tried to convince me of the importance of keeping our race "pure" and that minorities were taking over. He didn't exactly use those words, but that was the idea. I speak my mind, it's just how I am, so I explained my disagreements as tactfully as I knew how. At some point he asked me, an obviously pointed hypothetical. "What if, some day after you have kids, your beautiful daughter tells you she's in love with a "ni**ar?" My reply, "So what if she does?" "What does it matter, if they love each other and care for each other?" He tried to convince me of the error of my thinking, but I don't care. I know who I am, I know what I believe, and I know how I feel. 

That hasn't got much to do with these horrifying murders, it's just a little I remember of one person I knew, who was a skinhead. That conversation will always stick in my mind, unlike much of the rest of my tour in Korea. Wade Michael Page brutally killed several innocent people out of sheer hatred. I don't know if I can ever understand that kind of hatred. It so totally feels like sheer ignorance, total complete ignorance. Than again maybe people like this are missing any real sense of love, kindness, or compassion. I don't know, What do you think? Watch the video if you can find the time, it discusses some very important matters. Post in the comments section if you like.

Retention or progress

Right before summer, I got the news that Sebastian would be retained in 1st grade. I knew it could happen, but I always held out hope that he would scrape by and make it into the next grade.

You see, Sebastian has struggled with reading and writing the last two grades. At the last quarter of school this year, we received notice, on his report card, that he may not meet the reading standard for placement in 2nd grade. It did not leave much time to work on this. Sebastian is a smart kid, but is also very shy and has trouble requesting help when needed. The teachers also reported noticing lack of response when in group-discussions, and when being called on.

We had been working on this throughout the year, and he had also been identified to get help through Response To Intervention services. Therefore, I thought he would get the help he needs and be fine. We even requested evaluation for possible special needs. We worked to help him more, trying extra reading, tutoring, me coming in to help in class, and so on. At the end of the year, his reading had improved and good grades were coming in, especially the last couple of weeks. I had hoped that was enough, but I guess not.

The last report card came out and said he did not meet requirements to advance to 2nd grade. The teachers even said that his reading had improved, but not enough, and that his writing was too deficient. The writing was not news to us, but it was never written as a possible reason for him to be retained. There was no discussion with us, no meetings, or conference, just the final decision that he would be retained.

This whole summer this has weighed heavy on my mind. I do not feel retention is appropriate for moderate struggles. I also feel that much of his problems are not for lack of ability, but more for extreme shyness and lack of a real voice. The fact that we, the parents, were not included in the decision is really upsetting. The more I thought about it, the more wrong it seemed. What could be done? I mean the school already made their decision. There is no unfailing once you fail a school year. His Ex. Ed. Evaluation was not finished. There is no summer school to help him advance. Even with tutoring, that was not provided as an option for possible advancement, nothing was provided except retention.

The only options I could see were just to accept the retention and continue to support my child, or pull him out of school and home school him while I continue to support my child. I also work at the school, so I cannot just pull him out, I would have to quit also.

When my husband found out what I was considering, the clash was not pretty. He made it pretty clear, "I do not like the idea of homeschooling!”, and "I really do not like the idea of homeschooling!" This was followed by a lively discussion (argument) about the fault off him not catching up being my inability to help him as much as he needed. We all know that when s*it hits the fan it really hits the fan!

In the end of our angry heated discussion, I think I regained some reputation of ability to provide the help and support a mom needs to provide her children. I at least got an admission that hubby is willing to support whatever I decide. He also convinced me to at least call and discuss our disagreements concerning Sebastian's retention with the school principal.

7/11/2012

Now this is where we are. I have informed the principal of some of our issues with the retention, and thoughts of homeschooling him. We have an appointment with her on Tuesday to discuss this further. I have been researching homeschooling so I can be prepared if I choose that path. Sebastian has an ex Ed Evaluation on Wednesday. I am also looking into options for possible income if I choose to stay home.

I have tried to keep this hush-hush until we make a real decision. I know opinions on homeschooling are as vast and volatile as opinions on religion, so I do not want to tamper with those dynamics until I know what we will do. In fact, I will not publish this until a decision of some manner has been made.

7/18/2012

We had an appointment with the principal that went well. She set up an appointment to discuss more of a final decision, after test results are in, and after she has a chance to speak with his teachers. He has a Psych Evaluation tomorrow, and will take some academic tests next Monday. Then we go back to speak to the principal again, for a more final decision. It does sound as though she is leaning towards advancement to second grade, but we have to wait for her to weigh all the info.

7/25/2012

All is done. We talked to the principal. Testing was fine, teachers in agreement, and the plan now is to advance him to 2nd grade, keep working with him, and try to find ways to increase his courage. At the end of 2nd grade, we will see if he is ready for advancement to 3rd. I can still bring him to evening home school classes for supplement. This works for me. Now we have to keep on moving forward and see what the future holds.

Bus monitor bullied

There is a video on the internet that went viral last week. A sad and anger provoking video called "Making the bus monitor cry." Most likely you've heard of it and maybe watched it. The video shows just how rude, disrespectful, and disgraceful kids can be. Making matters worse, it displays this behavior from middle-school boys towards an elderly bus monitor. Most of us know, that you just don't go around disrespecting the elderly like that, but apparently these kids never got that in their unfabulous training. 

I have watched a lot of the video responses to this video, and read several written responses. People were genuinely hurt by the behavior of these children, and saddened to see a women that could have easily been anyone's grandma, harassed and bullied for 10 minutes straight. The biggest response ringing throughout many of the responses, is a general feeling that children in society today have grown to be completely lacking respect. Many posters, accusing parents of being at fault, and some insisting that had the children been spanked, this would never occur. I understand this response, people's feelings that society is losing its way, and their feelings that children have no respect or proper upbringing. However, I also like to look at the positive side of things when bad things occur. 


Consider this, many responses were from other young children and teens who were just as disgusted and revolted by the behavior of these boys as I was. Most of them spoke very well about the sadness, anger, and frustration they had at seeing other children treating another person this way. Almost all of them repeatedly stressed that you should never disrespect you elders like this. While some had a very hard time containing their temper, as did many of the adults, there where some who maintained their composure very well and spoke very eloquently about their genuine feelings on this matter. Several of them also spoke of the reality that the actions of children like this reflect very badly on their generation and society.


I know many of us want to lament about how proper and respectful children once were. They feel that poor parenting has destroyed the fabric of society, bringing rude disrespectful children that have no comprehension of responsibility. I see these children as one small sliver, creating havoc, wherever they go, and making others look bad. Yet, in many other children, there is a glimmer of hope, of graciousness, intelligence,  empathy, and true respect. If you look for it, if you pay attention, it shines through the brokenness and disrepair in our society. There is a light that comes from some of these children, and I think we need to help them and cultivate them to keep that light going strong. Not to squash them and squelch that light, while putting all our focus on the negative. 

We drain so much energy and emotion into what we feel is wrong with the world. I wonder what could happen if we put most of that energy and emotion into what is going well in this world. Don't we often say that children do bad things because they are looking for attention? Then we turn around and give them exactly what they are looking for, when they are doing the wrong things. Could we possibly give our attention to the good things happening every day, all around us? Could we put our energy, attention, hope, and care into the positive things that are going well? Children tend to learn by example; they live what they learn and learn what they live. So if they live and learn that we put our energy and attention into the good, awesome, positive things and people in this world, maybe being rude, disgraceful, and disrespectful wouldn't seem to be such a huge attention-getter. Still, I see far more light in this generation than many people will give them credit for.