The world of the not so typical

I was thinking about the reality that I use to write a lot of poetry, but I don't anymore. It struck me, that my writing was at it's peak when I was in the military and I was depressed. So why do I not write anymore? I do write, just not poetry. Could it be just because I'm older, have a family, and different priorities? I'm sure those are factors, but I would also contend that some of our best work comes from a time and place where we are not so typical. Let me explain my use of the word typical. This is a word we use often in the world of autism, to differentiate those with differences and those society considers "normal". Please don't harp on me about my use of "politically correct" terminology. I do this intentionally, because it is both used regularly in my field, and because it is more courteous then using some of the more disparaging words used to describe people with "differences" or "exceptionalities." While this may offend some or seem unimportant, it is my way of drawing a distinction between what some view as a problem and what others view as a difference. This distinction is very important because we too often assume that people with these differences are riddled with problems, or that they are defined by their disability or disorder. However, it is my belief that these things should not define a person, are not always problems, and are only a part of their total person. While none of us wants to be defined as our weakness or called our weakness, neither should we do that to others. Now, in the world of autism we use the word typical or neurotypical, to describe those without a neural disorder. The thinking here is that all too often things like autism or ADHD are considered a problem or a disability when some people do not feel they are a problem and/or do not consider it a disability. In fact, some traits that can come from ADHD and autism, are good or even "exceptional."

Back to my original point. Some of our best work comes from a time and place where we are not so typical. In my everyday, normal, humdrum life, I don't concern myself so much with writing down my deepest darkest thoughts. I go through day after day, worrying more about everyday events that probably aren't so very important. In fact, sometimes I may even go search out more interesting important topics to fill my need to feel involved, and to think and ponder matters of real importance. It is when things get tough, when my world isn't so typical that my need to create, and 'get out all the thoughts in my head' seems to really flourish. I suspect it is this way with many people. Do we do our best work when we are under pressure? I really think we see things differently and think differently when we are in the trenches, when the muck of life is really bearing down. Tragedy, depression, hardship, mental problems, and all those other things that can turn and alter our lives and our being seem to have a way of .... kicking us when we're down. Yet, sometimes such astonishing beauty, and amazing creation can come from the darkest times and places in our lives. Maybe it is a coping mechanism, maybe it's our way of really looking deep into the mess, while still feeling somewhat detached from it. I'm not sure, but I do think we create more, and create better when life isn't so normal, so typical. I don't miss it, or want it back, quite the contrary, but I do acknowledge that our darkest hours can produce the most amazing things. I would think that the key is, to find a way out of those places, before you drowned in misery and can't escape. Maybe if you're lucky, you can get back to the boring, humdrum, normal, typical life. Maybe not. Even so, if you can get yourself up from those dark times, pull yourself up with some help, dust yourself off, and not get lost forever, sucked into those terrible places, then all the better for you and the world. It's just too bad we lose some, who get lost and can't make their way out. That really sucks, yet it happens all to often.

Now enough of me talking such depressing stuff! It's time for me to be happy, at my wonderfully boring normal life. Though I will always be thankful, in some strange sort of way, for those dark times, but mostly for being able to escape.

Bus monitor bullied

There is a video on the internet that went viral last week. A sad and anger provoking video called "Making the bus monitor cry." Most likely you've heard of it and maybe watched it. The video shows just how rude, disrespectful, and disgraceful kids can be. Making matters worse, it displays this behavior from middle-school boys towards an elderly bus monitor. Most of us know, that you just don't go around disrespecting the elderly like that, but apparently these kids never got that in their unfabulous training. 

I have watched a lot of the video responses to this video, and read several written responses. People were genuinely hurt by the behavior of these children, and saddened to see a women that could have easily been anyone's grandma, harassed and bullied for 10 minutes straight. The biggest response ringing throughout many of the responses, is a general feeling that children in society today have grown to be completely lacking respect. Many posters, accusing parents of being at fault, and some insisting that had the children been spanked, this would never occur. I understand this response, people's feelings that society is losing its way, and their feelings that children have no respect or proper upbringing. However, I also like to look at the positive side of things when bad things occur. 


Consider this, many responses were from other young children and teens who were just as disgusted and revolted by the behavior of these boys as I was. Most of them spoke very well about the sadness, anger, and frustration they had at seeing other children treating another person this way. Almost all of them repeatedly stressed that you should never disrespect you elders like this. While some had a very hard time containing their temper, as did many of the adults, there where some who maintained their composure very well and spoke very eloquently about their genuine feelings on this matter. Several of them also spoke of the reality that the actions of children like this reflect very badly on their generation and society.


I know many of us want to lament about how proper and respectful children once were. They feel that poor parenting has destroyed the fabric of society, bringing rude disrespectful children that have no comprehension of responsibility. I see these children as one small sliver, creating havoc, wherever they go, and making others look bad. Yet, in many other children, there is a glimmer of hope, of graciousness, intelligence,  empathy, and true respect. If you look for it, if you pay attention, it shines through the brokenness and disrepair in our society. There is a light that comes from some of these children, and I think we need to help them and cultivate them to keep that light going strong. Not to squash them and squelch that light, while putting all our focus on the negative. 

We drain so much energy and emotion into what we feel is wrong with the world. I wonder what could happen if we put most of that energy and emotion into what is going well in this world. Don't we often say that children do bad things because they are looking for attention? Then we turn around and give them exactly what they are looking for, when they are doing the wrong things. Could we possibly give our attention to the good things happening every day, all around us? Could we put our energy, attention, hope, and care into the positive things that are going well? Children tend to learn by example; they live what they learn and learn what they live. So if they live and learn that we put our energy and attention into the good, awesome, positive things and people in this world, maybe being rude, disgraceful, and disrespectful wouldn't seem to be such a huge attention-getter. Still, I see far more light in this generation than many people will give them credit for. 

Ahhhhhhhhrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!! My head hurts! Gotta get it out! There is so much stuff that goes on in my head. I need an outlet to get some of it out in the air. What's in my head? Who cares? I just need to vent, discuss, spew, whatever. My other blog is on my education journey, which limits topics I choose to talk about. This blog should, hopefully, provide an outlet for just about any topic. This can also give me some freedom to try out, and experiment with a variety of options for different types of blog posts. It shall be my learning and growing blog tool. I want to try out some video and audio. I will see how it goes. For now, however, I must head to bed.  Good night -_- sleep tight zzzzzzzz don't let the bedbugs bite!